What a wild and crazy guy, that Che Guevara! CNN was the first U.S. network Fidel Castro bestowed with a Havana Bureau, so Morgan’s epic stupidity might be superseded by other factors here. And Sheen’s meltdown has greatly accelerated since then. But Piers Morgan’s stupidity still presents an irresistible lure. So let’s get started.

The puritan Stalinist Piers who Morgan equates with Charlie Sheen initiated Cuba’s forced-labor camp system. “We send (to these prison-camps) people who have committed crimes against revolutionary morals,” warned the KGB-tutored Che Guevara, whose definition of such “offenses” proved pretty sweeping. In fact they read like Charlie’s Sheen’s daily planner.

Che Guevara’s first decree when his rebels captured the town of Sancti Spiritus in central Cuba during the last days of the skirmishing against Batista’s army, outlawed alcohol, gambling and regulated relations between the sexes. Popular outcry and Fidel’s sharp political sense made him rescind the order.

“I have no home, no woman, no parents, no brothers and no friends,” wrote this Wild and Crazy Guy in his diaries. “My friends are friends only so long as they think as I do politically.”

“We punish individuals who refuse to participate in collective effort and who lead an antisocial and parasitic life,” read Beria and Vishinky’s charges against millions of Stalin’s victims. “We punish individualists and antisocial miscreants!”